Horse Called Elmer

Falling apart like a Lego set breaks.

Don’t know how long a sunset takes,
but it’s burning down on me.

Pretty sure I was going to get older.
Great ball of fire on my shoulder.

Going to jump in the lake and sea.

You know I’m a horse called Elmer.

Don’t want to overwhelm her.
But my cannon’s killing me.

Who’ll Bear Witness to my long shot.
I can barely even hot trot.

Not long until the factory.

Yes, I’ll miss the lips I kiss,

the feeling and the fit
of harnessed hips, and reigns and whips,
of bridal parts and bits.

Hung like a Shetland pony.

That’s just soft macaroni.
Who’s Al Dente anyway?

Sounds like he may have been a mobster.


Handshake grip you like a lobster.

Wears concrete shoes in Georgian Bay.

Sired some fillies out of wedlock.

Feels like I might have snapped a fetlock.


Can’t no one put me down.

Patch me together with a glue stick.
Teach the old dog another new trick.

Bring a dog and pony to your town. 

It may be a tacky proposition

while I jockey for position.
You see the catch 22?

They’re using what they’ll turn me into
to make a mustang from a pinto.

It’s a lucky brake horseshoe.

No foot ever in the stirrup.

Bootlick likes the maple syrup.
Flapjacks pissing on the Dalton Road.

Grandstand, winding up a new song.
Homestretch, what’s another furlong?

Got grilled last time I showed.

Finish, going to the photo.

Saddle bag counting on some big dough.
Keep your eyes glued to the board.

That’s me with a cheesy horse dip.
Beat them by a long face and a fat lip -

a gifty mouth that you ignored.

© AudSongs 2019

Circus - The Kelly Song Collective
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© 2020 The Kelly Song Collective